Big Brother Titus

Titus,

My cool kid.

  I want to take some time to write to you right now as we are approaching a major change in our family's life in the coming months.  Daddy and I have decided we want to open up our home to a foster child.  It was a decision that we made together and it was surprising how quickly we went from not having it on our mind to knowing it was what we needed to do.  We have always been pretty sure we would grow our family, but I wanted it to be through adoption and dad was unsure if he wanted to adopt or have more biological children. Neither of us had really considered foster care, mostly

Hugging buddy Lincoln. You are such a lover. 

because of the fear of how painful it could be for US.  However, something this past fall really struck us when we saw someone's facebook post about how many babies and children were sleeping on an office floor in some CPS office because there were not enough foster homes. For the first time I really let myself think about the fact that those kids are just like mine. They need snuggles and kisses and to laugh and be rocked to sleep.  They have fear and needs and behaviors. They are a gift from God. And they were sleeping on floors without anyone to meet their needs, let alone to snuggle and kiss them and make them laugh.  Daddy and I decided to go to an orientation and learn more about foster care. We agreed to start the process and see where it took us. Now we are about half way through and we have decided to take in one child at a time. We decided to take in a child under age 2, for your protection, but we are open to race and gender.  So, for the first time, we are expecting a child but we don't know anything about it.

Playing with your big brother

  My biggest fear in this whole process is that you will get hurt.  You are my baby and we have been so incredibly close in the past several months. You are used to being the baby and getting a certain level of attention from me, daddy and Maximus. Now, though, you will have to share your attention with a younger child who may have a lot of needs. I don't want you to think that you are in any way being replaced and I don't want you to think that you may be sent away the way a foster child could be.  You and your brother get along so well and never seem to be jealous of each other, but even Maximus seems a little apprehensive about another little one entering the home.  It will definitely change the dynamic of the family. It will definitely be hard to say goodbye if and when that day comes.  But daddy and I would not have decided to do this if we didn't think the good would outweigh any negative impact on you.  I think you will grow a lot and learn a lot and love a lot through the process. I pray it will give you perspective and compassion and a desire to change the world.  You are such an amazing little boy and I believe you can change the world.  So, we will start one child at a time, as a family.

I love you Ty Ty.